How to increase your partner’s anxiety (so you can stop doing it). We often think anxious partners are “too emotional” or “too needy.” But many times, their anxiety grows in response to how we show up. When we dismiss feelings, intellectualize pain, or shut down emotional conversations, we reinforce the very fears we’re trying to soothe. If your partner feels anxious, it’s not a sign they’re broken, it’s a signal the relationship needs more safety. Validation isn’t about agreeing with everything